Friday, August 21, 2009

Our Vegas Vacation Part II

Well, it's good thing that there are so many things to do and see in Vegas, because walking will do you a bit of good after the buffets. I went in a fairly decent in-shape middle aged man and came out looking five and half months pregnant.

Avast, ye blog readers, heave to! A lot has changed in the fifteen years since The Missus and meself set foot in Vegas. The last time we were here, fifty mile an hour winds prevented the pirate show from going on at Treasure Island...

...needless to say, this isn't your parent's pirate show. Gone are the days where they had sword fights, muskets and one ship rammed into the other. Or at least that was the way the old show was described to me. I realize that everything has to change to attract a new audience, though the show I had described was not the show that my thirteen year-old saw.

The wind cries...who? The statue (is that what it's called? on the prow of The Siren's ship should be your first clue that once again, this is not your parent's pirate show.

This is your other clue that the show has changed. The major casinos had custom chopper with a theme to it. This one is for the "Sirens of Treasure Island," which is what the new show is called.

None of the custom choppers are street-legal. If you rode on one, at the first pothole or speed bump, the drive chain would rips the seat of your pants off...along with your seat and maybe your spine.

Sorry, my cell phone camera doesn't have zoom and this is the one time I wish it had a telephoto lens. Yet I guess their "siren song" can't be too effective, if they need those costumes. I didn't bother taking a picture of the pirates, though you could have had a good laugh at the one that was done up like parrot. Everyone lip-syncs their routine, which is understandable because you don't want to mike people with water and explosions involved. What I really, really could have done without was the dancing pirates.

So much for the "S.S. Dancing Pirate." The Sirens song that they used to sink it, was a combination "Don't Pay The Ferryman" and "The Immigrant Song." It not only sunk the pirate ship, it sunk my stomach too with its mediocrity.

Don't get me wrong, the women were pretty. I just prefer my pron...hardcore and with no dancing in it. I'm not a fan of soft-core reviews, though I understand they are Nevada's bread and butter. Yet I am not a fan of mixed genres and this was as mixed-up as tourist ralphing up his buffet after three too many drinks.

Either run a competent soft-core review or have a real action show, but don't make us stand around for thirty minutes, for a bad Britney Spears' video.

The rear view of the Sirens' ship and, uh, a pearl in a scallop shell?

This shot was from a pedestrian bridge, though you can't tell. The traffic around the strip was horrid.

This part of a monster mall that they have there, is it called "Fashion Island?" Hell if I can remember, I just like this pancake umbrella dome. Ah, the pic says "Fashion Show," let's go with that.

Looking out from The Pancake Umbrella Dome.

The vid screens there.

The next post will feature Downtown and "The Fremont Street Experience."


Baroness von Bloggenschtern said...

If you loved your Grumpy Bunny, you would procure that giant pearl so she could make a necklace out of it.

Please don't question my taste, but I love the inside of New York, New York. It's got a kind of dollhouse quality to it, and you know damn well that all visiting NY'ers hate it. Fun!

Cormac Brown said...


Uh, even if that pearl were hollow, it would still take a woman's neck off from the weight.

I like the casino, but I love the real thing and I never question the taste of true royalty. I do however, always question those impostors in England.